The Alternative
by RayLedgend
Summary: What happens when the Elric brothers are given a quick and easy way to get their bodies back. No tricks, and no catch . . . well, there is one catch. Read to find out. Rated T for language and a suggestive sexual line or two.


It was a tough time for the Elrics. It was just after they learned that Philosopher's Stones were made from human lives in episode 7 or some shit of the Brotherhood anime.

"Damn, this sucks!" Edward punched the ground. "The one hope we have, and this is what it takes?"

Alphonse grew silent, but if he still had a human face, you'd see he felt just as angry and defeated as his brother. It was now, in their shared despair that an angel of hope descended to them. Literally. A tiny pixie like angel descended into the room on a beam of light. She had no clothes to speak of, but no discernable anatomy either, like a naked Barbie with wings. The two boys were too dejected to notice the world around them, so the ray of light went unseen, but the angel made her presence known soon enough.

"So, what have we here? Two victims of alchemy's ultimate taboo." This got the brothers' attention, as they turned around right quick to meet their unseen intruder.

"Yeah, and what the hell do you want to do about it?" Edward challenged.

"What I want is to offer one of you a way to retrieve your original form."

If the Elrics had learned anything in their short lives it's that if something sounds too good to be true, then it definitely is, but for the sake of my plot, they believed her completely.

"Our original forms?" Ed said with shock. "That's great, but what do you mean one of us?"

"Just what it sounds like. One of you will recover to your original form, but the other . . . will lose their soul entirely." The pixie finished her explanation with a menacing tone, and the Elrics just lost themselves in astonishment.

"Brother, you should take it." Al expected a challenge. He expected his brother to say something like 'if both of us can't get our bodies back, neither one will,' or to insist that it was his fault either of them were like this and give up his soul instead, but the response he got was downright shocking.

"You don't have to tell me twice!" Ed said with a grin. "Alright lady, magic my body back!"

"W-wait!" Alphonse interrupted, still reeling from the shock. "You aren't even going to argue?"

"To hell with that shit! You already offered. Thanks for that, bro." Edward winked at Al, and gave him a smug thumbs up.

"I should warn you boys." The pixie spoke again. "The one who loses their soul won't simply vanish. They will suffer untold agony. Imagine the feeling of your nails ripped out day after day for centuries. Imagine the feeling of your bones being ripped from your sockets as your limbs are ripped out, one by one. Imagine tiny blades ripping you apart from the inside out. The feeling of needles forcing their way through your eyes, as your skin is ripped off, and boiling water is poured on your under flesh! It's worse than hell, and the sufferer will experience it countless times as their soul is slowly deleted."

"Yikes, tough break, Al. Looks like you'll be having a rough time of it."

"Wait! I've changed my mind!" Al tried desperately to avoid his fate. "Maybe we could fight for it?" Al hoped his brother's competitive nature would override his newfound selfishness . . . no such luck.

"Nah, too late for that shit. You made the offer, now you gotta live with it. Oh man, I can't wait to have my real arm back." Edward got positively giddy at the thought of all the stuff he'd be able to touch with his old arm back.

"No! This isn't right!" Al's voice started to crack, and if he could cry, he'd practically be a fountain right now, not just because of the fear, but the betrayal. The betrayal hurt worse.

"Hey, no cryin', Al. You made your bed, now you have to sleep in it."

"Well, then!" The angel spoke once more. "To make it official, the both of you will have to tell me your choice individually. Blondie, who do you choose to get their body back?"

"Do you even need to ask? Me, naturally!"

"Yes, of course. And you, metal boy?"

Here, Al thought "now's my chance," but before he could speak, he was interrupted. "Don't even bother asking him! Al chooses me, too."

"Wait, no, I-"

"Then it is settled. You, Alphonse Elric shall lose your soul, and in exchange, your brother shall recover his natural body!"

"Oh, yes, can you believe it, Al? Everything I worked for! I'm finally getting it back! High five?" Before Ed could high five his brother, though, Alphonse vanished to suffer for god knows how long. "Well, too late for that, then. Thanks, pixie lady!"

"It was my pleasure, boy. Enjoy your real body!"

And at that, Edward was engulfed in a dome of pure white light. His metallic limbs were slowly disintegrated away, and his arm and leg grew back to normal. It was a painless process, and he came out better than new.

"Great!" Ed jumped for joy. "Now to go tell Winry." And tell her he did. Ed ran back to his home town, and showed Winry his newly recovered limbs. He also told his mom she could stop pretending to be dead now that Alphonse was gone and couldn't bother her anymore. Happy to finally be out of the secret underground shelter she'd been hiding in, Mrs. Elric lived a long and happy life with her favorite son. Years later, Edward fucked the shit out of Winry and had 2 beautiful children.

And they all lived happily ever after.

**The End**

**So, I was watching this series for the first time, and I just kept thinking it'd be silly if Ed turned out this way, so I went ahead and wrote the story in about 45 minutse. You know, I actually never watched any Fullmetal Alchemist until recently. I decided to give it ago, and it's actually as good as everyone says, save for some of that anime style humor that I'm just not a fan of. I haven't finished the series, but I'm gonna, 'cause it's a good one. Well, Brotherhood anyway. I actually did try a couple episodes of the original, and didn't care much for it, sorry =P Well, anyway, please remember to review, and I'll see you next fanfiction.**


End file.
